It was a momentous morning in the Goodwin household this morning. You see after months of work and trying and frustration my sweet Avarie has successfully ...
TIED HER OWN SHOE!!!!
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| The victorious knot! |
It was a proud moment for Matt and I as the light of victory came into her eyes. I loved to see her beaming with pride as I carefully inspected her knot to see if this was the time that she "really had done it all on her own." And reflecting on this in the car on the way to work this morning all I could think of is that this moment was one of those great joys of parenting - as amazing and humbling to watch as a little ones first steps.
There are a lot of "non-joys" of parenting - being peed on, being vomited on, worrying through the night as you hear your little ones coughing in the room next door - but they can't compare to these joys. It's mindblowing to me how many of the little victories add up to make my day feel like its worth it. A smile in the morning, the sight of Avarie celebrating as her team scores a soccer goal, a real hug, the sight of my son running to me as soon as they call "Beau... your mom's here...", even something as simple as watching my daughter learn to tie her shoe.
Of course... it's equally terrifying. Each wobbly step, each tied shoe, each new word she can read on her own... they are all another step away from my safe arms and into the world as a new, independent person. I heard someone say on television just yesterday morning that our job as parents is to teach our kids how to not need us any more, and I thought that summed it up pretty well.
Matt and I are so incredibly blessed with the children that God has chosen to loan us for a time here on Earth. Sometimes it's hard for me to remember that they don't really belong to me - they belong to Him - and He celebrates each victory with us. I'm blessed to have a husband who feels an equal responsibility that the children that we have been blessed with must grow up knowing that we love them and that we support them no matter what, but also that in the end they belong to the Father and must live as we do according to His word and His will. We aren't promised that this life will be easy - and in my experience the things that are really worth it never are. I love the way the Message puts it...
31-33Jesus answered them, "Do you finally believe? In fact, you're about to make a run for it—saving your own skins and abandoning me. But I'm not abandoned. The Father is with me. I've told you all this so that trusting me, you will be unshakable and assured, deeply at peace. In this godless world you will continue to experience difficulties. But take heart! I've conquered the world." John 16:33
I find myself wondering how many of the little victories I celebrate with God each day. How many time that I stop to think about the little victories that He's accorded me, and if He's doing the happy dance in Heaven with me. I've spent a lot of my life pursuing big dreams. I achieved obtaining my doctorate at 31 while working full time as a middle school teacher and while having two small children. In fact, if you didn't know I took my comp exams on a Friday and had Beau on the next Monday (because I rescheduled the c-section around my comp exams - true story... I've never seen such crazy looks from nurses before...they could tell I'd lost touch with reality). I know how to pursue big dreams. But in the end I've found that as I've become a parent, it's the little dreams that life is made up of. Beau is mastering potty training and Avarie learns to read better every day. I can't wait to see the great and wonderful small victories that await me tomorrow....
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